Delirium/Transcript: Difference between revisions

{{Infobox transcript

|act = 3rin

|title = Delirium

|characters=*[[Hisao Nakai]]

}}

NARRATOR: "I climb upstairs and enter carefully. The room is dark because of the quickly falling night, but I can see Rin, or rather her silhouette, sitting on the floor. So she's got her inspiration back like Sae said, and moved from easel to painting on the floor. Before I manage five steps I stop, frozen in my tracks. The ironic realization that human cognitive ability is commendable echoes through my mind. From a mere movement of her shadow it took me a fraction of a second to realize something is awry, process what I'm seeing, formulate the answer and blush all the way up to the tips of my ears."

NARRATOR: "Rin is sitting on the floor with her legs under her. She moves in rhythmical motions back and forth, slowly grinding herself against herself. Her breathing is so heavy it's almost visible in the dim light. It's the heavy panting of one who doesn't have the option of breathing gracefully. Her hips, mere shadows against the dim light shining on her from above, are swinging circularly over and over again. She hasn't noticed me, so engrossed she is in her... activity."

NARRATOR: "The deadlock solves itself before I get a chance to think what to do next. Something in the atmosphere of the room changes, a little thing, not consciously noticeable, but it changes. Perhaps a timid current from the opened door, or a minute change in air pressure, the sound of my breathing (even though I notice I haven't taken a breath for many many seconds), the aura of my presence. That something catches Rin's senses."

NARRATOR: "She stops moving, freezes and slowly turns to the door. I imagine, not see, the horror on her face, like a fawn's eyes staring at a hunter. I wonder if Rin can see my expression but at least she doesn't have the strength or the spirit to look straight in my eyes. So, she droops her chin against her chest, letting her mess of a hair hide her face from me even further. I feel like I should either walk out or walk to her, but I can't do either."

HISAO: "I'm sorry. I didn't think..."

RIN: "It's not like that..."

NARRATOR: "Her voice is raspy, shivering from held back tears or something else. She is shaking, looking like she is physically in pain."

RIN: "It's not like that. I..."

NARRATOR: "My voice is dry and quiet, like sandpaper coming out of my throat. I really am sorry, sorry for seeing this. I don't want to see Rin like this. All I can see is her sadness. Her stress and despair. Is this what a “limit” means? Why would - how could [[Sae]] and [[Nomiya]] let Rin go this far? Or is it me who is to blame?"

NARRATOR: "I almost walk out, right there, but at the last moment I turn around, steel myself and walk to Rin to crouch down behind her and lightly touch her forehead. She doesn't resist or react. I can't leave her like this. She's not well. She feels like she has a fever, freezing cold and burning hot at the same time. I wonder if she got sick from staying out all night with me back then. It seems she's prone to getting ill. There is a blanket on the couch, but I wrap my arms around Rin instead of fetching it. She does not resist my clumsy hug, only slumps her head lower, deepening the shadows hiding her face from me."

HISAO: "It's fine. Don't worry about it. Just relax."

NARRATOR: "Even though I said that, I'm on the verge of breaking myself. If I wasn't so nervous, I would laugh at my own nervousness. She wants to be comforted, and I want to comfort her. But in this way... I move my hand lower, touching the naked skin of her stomach, caressing Rin with my hand. Her muscles contract timidly, evading my touch, but soon they find their trust in me and relax."

NARRATOR: "In that moment, I felt that it was not only Rin who lost something of hers. I felt like I was losing a part of myself, or maybe all of me. But if you were to ask what was it that I lost, I couldn't say, because I had already forgotten it. I broke another promise by coming out with my honest feelings to Rin. That's two in one day."

RIN: "That's weird."

NARRATOR: "Rin moves her body in my arms, searching for a comfortable position in our very uncomfortable position. She leans against me, closing her eyes, and lets one last long breath out before settling into the steady rhythm of sleep. With her last moment of awareness she whispers something to me but I can't hear it. Rin drifts deeper into sleep with a deep sigh that releases all remaining tension from her muscles. I try to shift around to place both of us more comfortably. It takes a while because I don't want to wake up Rin even though she probably wouldn't, but eventually I find a position I am somewhat comfortable with."

NARRATOR: "I lean against the soft cushions of the couch and breathe in the cool air of the atelier. Rin's head rests against my chest, as if she was listening to my heartbeats. Echoes of her dream ripple as small twitches on her face, like a cat sleeping the mouse-hunter's dream. The full moon, shining her pale light upon us from beyond the skylight, reflects from a blank canvas standing forgotten on the easel. Its whiteness is glowing against the dark night of the atelier."

[[Category:Act 3 Transcripts]]

[[Category:Act 3 - Distance Transcripts]]